In a widely panned move 24 of the leading mobile international mega-corps have combined their pitiful app marketplace efforts to challenge the inexorable worldwide domination of Apple’s iTunes App Store. Despite holding a minority share of the mobile platform market, Apple accounts for roughly 95% of App sales with something like ten zillion downloads. That’s about 15,000 for every person on Earth, or to put this mind boggling figure in a more comprehensible perspective, that’s about one app download for every US deficit dollar owed by each man, woman and child in America.
The Wholesale Applications Community, or The WAC as they prefer to be known, aim to unite a fragmented marketplace and create an open industry platform that benefits everybody — from applications developers and network operators to mobile phone users themselves, and in physical combat, triumph over Apple’s giant robotic simulacrum, the iTunastroyer. This 565.2 foot tall mechanized butchery machine has been demoed by Apple CEO Steve Jobs on numerous occasions and has been proven in it’s ability to completely demolish small to mid-size cities, such as Tulsa OK, and to hypnotically control an undead army of “App Developers” who swarm like uncountable gnats at it’s opponents eyes, nose, mouth, and erogenous zones.
In short the iTunastroyer is sophisticated as hell, but curiously it still does not support Flash.
Artist rendition of iTunastroyer
While complete details of WAC Force 24 are being held under tight secrecy it is known that the CEO’s of each of the corporations committed to the initiative will have a unique super power, and each member CEO is being fitted for a distinctively colored skintight spandex unitard bodysuit. Anonymous sources place Apple CEO Steve Jobs seated at the throne in the control room of his mist shrouded, artificial volcanic isle off the coast of California. Upon hearing the WAC initiative Jobs reportedly stared mysteriously off into the distance, with a vague, menacing smile and said, “Bring it on,” before barking out a extended peal of his trademark maniacal laughter, the iLaugh.
Photo credits: http://www.flickr.com/photos/johnjoh/ | http://www.flickr.com/photos/gee01/